Billy Graham

[liddie]

Billy Graham was returning to Charlotte after a speaking engagement.

When his plane arrived there was a limousine there to transport him to his home.

As he prepared to get into the limo, he stopped and spoke to the driver.

"You know" he said, "I am 87 years old and I have never driven a limousine.

Would you mind if I drove it for a while?"



The driver said, "No problem. Have at it."



Billy gets into the driver's seat and they head off down the highway.

A short distance away sat a rookie State Trooper operating his first speed trap.


The long black limo went by him doing 70 in a 55 mph zone.

The trooper pulled out and easily caught the limo and got out of his patrol

car to begin the procedure.



The young trooper walked up to the driver's door and when the glass was rolled

down he was surprised to see who was driving.

He immediately excused himself and went back to his car and called his supervisor.



He told the supervisor, "I know we are supposed to enforce the law but I also know

that important people are given certain courtesies.

I need to know what I should do because I have stopped a very important person."



The supervisor asked, "Is it the governor?"



The young trooper said, "No, he's more important than that."



The supervisor said, "Oh, so it's the president."



The young trooper said, "Not, he's even more important than that."



The supervisor finally asked, "Well then, who is it?"



The young trooper said, "I think it's Jesus because he's got Billy Graham for a chauffeur

[liddie]

>
> An Old Duck
>
> A man took his old duck to the Vet., concerned because the duck wouldn't
> eat.
>
> The Vet explained to the man that as ducks age their upper
> bills grow down over their lower bills and make it difficult for
> the animal to pick up it's food.
>
> "What you need to do is gently file the upper bill down even with
> the lower bill. But you must be extra careful because the duck's
> nostrils are located in the upper bill and if you file down too
> far, when the duck takes a drink of water it'll drown."
>
> The man goes about his business and about a week later the Vet
> runs into the man again.
>
> "Well, how is that duck of yours?" the Vet inquires.
>
> "He's dead." declared the heartbroken man.
>
> "I told you not to file his upper bill down too far! He took a
> drink of water and drowned didn't he?" insisted the Vet.
>
> "No." lamented the man. "I think he was dead before I took him
> out of the vise."